Episode 992- Jenni Nather
In this episode, Andrew sits down and chats with Jenni Nather, whistlekick’s Book Director as well as host of Free Training Day Mid Atlantic. Join them as they discuss her journey through anxiety and martial arts.
Jenni Nather - Episode 992
SUMMARY
In this episode, Jenny Nather discusses her journey in martial arts, from her initial interest sparked in childhood to overcoming personal challenges and anxiety. She shares her experiences of training alongside her children, the impact of her past relationships on her mental health, and how martial arts became a source of strength and confidence. The conversation highlights her growth as an instructor and her recent achievements in teaching, emphasizing the transformative power of martial arts in her life. In this engaging conversation, she shares her journey from a transcriptionist to a martial arts instructor and community builder. She discusses her pivotal role in creating the Free Training Day Mid-Atlantic, emphasizing the importance of community and connection in martial arts. Jenni reflects on her experiences at various events, the impact of storytelling through books, and her commitment to fostering kindness and openness within the martial arts community. She also hints at future projects, including a new book focused on fathers in martial arts.
TAKEAWAYS
Jenny's martial arts journey began in childhood, influenced by pop culture.
She faced initial anxiety about training and teaching but found encouragement.
The support of her children motivated her to pursue martial arts.
Personal challenges, including a difficult divorce, shaped her resilience.
Martial arts provided a safe space during turbulent times.
Jenny's confidence grew as she progressed through the ranks.
Teaching became a significant hurdle for her due to anxiety.
She learned to embrace her role as an instructor over time.
Recent experiences have helped her build confidence in teaching.
Building community is essential in martial arts.
Openness in martial arts leads to growth.
Books can tell powerful stories and connect people.
Moms in martial arts face unique challenges.
Creating habits can transform health and wellness.
CHAPTERS
00:00 Jenny's Martial Arts Journey Begins
11:49 Overcoming Anxiety and Embracing Training
17:21 Navigating Personal Challenges and Martial Arts
24:51 Building Confidence and Teaching
30:31 Recent Developments and Future Aspirations
31:51 The Journey Begins: From Transcription to Teaching
35:38 Creating Community: The Birth of Free Training Day Mid-Atlantic
39:23 Reflections on the First Free Training Day
42:41 Breaking Barriers: Expanding Horizons in Martial Arts
47:16 The Power of Storytelling: Books and Their Impact
53:22 Looking Ahead: Future Endeavors and New Projects
After listening to the episode, it would be exciting for us to know your thoughts about it.
✅Subscribe to whistlekick Martial Arts Radio on the following platforms:
🎧Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/3mVnZmf
🎧Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3yHVdHQ
🎧Google: https://bit.ly/3kLSpo8
✅You can find whistlekick on all social media platforms using the handle @whistlekick or visit our website at https://www.whistlekick.com or https://www.whistlekickmartialartsradio.com
Show Transcript
Andrew (05:07.58)
Welcome, you're listening to another episode of Whistlekick Martial Arts Radio. And today I'm joined by Jenny Nather. Jenny, how are you today? I'm great, thanks for being here.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (05:16.061)
I am fabulous. How are you my friend?
Andrew (05:20.416)
Before we get into chatting, just want to make sure to let all of our listeners know all of the stuff that we do here at Whistlekick. Maybe this is your first episode, in which case, welcome. It's great to have you here. We here at Whistlekick Martial Arts Radio provide two episodes for free. Absolutely free. It costs you nothing. And as of recording this, we are coming up on nearly a thousand episodes that have cost nothing for you, the audience, to listen to.
How does that all happen? Well, it happens because we do lots of stuff here at Whistlekick. If you go to whistlekick.com, you can find out all of the things that we do. Maybe you want to go there and purchase some merchandise. Maybe you want to attend one of our events. Maybe you want to purchase the vast number of books that our growing library is coming. And Jenny's nodding her head. I suspect we'll talk about books.
Maybe you want to save some money on those purchases. You can use the code podcast one five and save yourself 15 % off nearly everything that we have there. And who doesn't like to save money. So please go ahead and do that. You can also go to whistlekickmarshallartsradio.com to find show notes on this episode and every episode that we've ever released. can find transcripts, photos of our guests.
and it's a great easy location to find everything about the podcast. But let's move forward. Jenny, how are you today? You're doing good, you said.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (06:50.349)
I said, yes, fantastic actually.
Andrew (06:53.065)
Now we were chatting a little bit before and you mentioned that you're nervous, but we get to be nervous together because this is new for me as well. So, Jenny, we've known each other for a while, but I don't know much of your history of martial arts. And so I'm excited to dive in. So to pull an old
"Philly Jenni" Nather (06:57.485)
Hiya!
"Philly Jenni" Nather (07:02.251)
Yay!
Andrew (07:21.172)
thing from Jeremy, if we were to have a comic book of your life, what would episode one of your Marshall journey, what would that look like?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (07:28.863)
That would take us back to about fourth grade. There was a fellow student who brought in a picture of himself in his karate uniform doing a full split as his show and tell. And I was just blown away. I was like, that is so cool. And of course, we're going to start talking things like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the Power Rangers and all these great influences and Karate Kid and things like that. So there was interest in me.
since I was a little kid. I'm trying to think of how I want to word this. I'll say it first and then I'll go back and fix something. When I came home after seeing that amazing karate picture, I asked if I could do karate. And the general impression that I was left with was that girls don't do that stuff.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (08:25.133)
I had a chat with my mom not too long ago and she had no idea that that's how I felt after having that conversation at such a young age. My mom was a woman in the financial world in the 80s and 90s and she was fantastic at her job and she took a lot of stuff from the male counterparts in her field.
Andrew (08:35.348)
Hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (08:52.588)
The last thing she ever wanted her daughter to feel was that she wasn't allowed to do something. And she and I had had a chat and we cleared the air about that. It's not necessarily how she wanted me to feel about it. It was in fact a financial thing. I was the oldest of four kids and you know, life was what it was at that point. So it was just not possible. Fasting forward.
Andrew (08:59.221)
Hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (09:22.557)
and fast forwarding rather and going to the early 2000s at this point I have three boys and I lied I had two boys at this point and one of them wanted to be Batman so right absolutely I'm so proud and my
Andrew (09:43.762)
Okay, noble aspiration.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (09:50.548)
husband at the time and I found a school for him and he loved it and it wasn't too long before his younger brother joined him. And then I was pregnant with baby number three and unfortunately that school had to close. So we took a pause, went through a divorce, which is another fantastic story, and shortly after the divorce the one thing that my ex and I agreed was that they needed to get back into karate. So
We found another school and signed them up pretty much immediately after meeting the instructor. And that was 2011.
I took my first class on November 3rd of 2012. Yes, because after all that time sitting in the lobby, the instructor had finally said, you know what, you should train. And I was like, heck yes, I just needed somebody to ask. just, that's it. That's all I needed was somebody to ask so that I could say yes. And you know, I'm not going to lie. I was super nervous. The anxiety was, you know, not as bad as it had gotten after that moment, but
Andrew (10:35.751)
Wow, okay.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (10:58.156)
The anxiety kept me thinking, okay, well, I'm their mom. Maybe I shouldn't be here. Maybe they'll be embarrassed. You know, all these things that will go through a mom's head. But it didn't take long for me to realize that not only did I enjoy what I was doing, but my kids loved having me do something with them. So it was, it was sort of magical that we all fell into it that way. And gosh, two of my sons are on a break. I'm in, I'm in denial. I'm calling it a break.
Andrew (11:27.092)
You
"Philly Jenni" Nather (11:27.959)
But my oldest one is an instructor here at our school with us. I still have some family tied to what we do. But I'm going to say it was about green belt for me. a little over a year after I started training, I knew that this was my path. I knew that this was what was missing for me. And I was stuck. I was in. There was no way you were going to get me out.
Andrew (11:49.737)
Now, what was it like sitting, watching your, between 2011 and 12, your son is doing martial arts and you're sitting in the lobby just watching for an entire year. Talk a little bit about what that was like.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (12:06.007)
For me, I was doing a lot of analyzing. I would listen very carefully to the instructor, basically absorb what I was hearing, watch my kids as they were working together and say, okay, I get it. That's how that moves. And when they were at home and doing play karate stuff, I would love to sit there and comment and get involved and be like, wait a minute, what if you do this and what if you do that and how about this? And it was fun to be able to share something with my kids.
And yes, inside I was like jumping out of my skin to want to be out there doing it with them. I just, that anxiety told me that it wasn't for me. And I just sat there quietly and basically waited for the invitation.
Andrew (12:52.373)
And after that invitation came, was it, I mean, you said you were about green belt when you're like, this is what I want to do. What was it? Well, did something happen at that point that something clicked? Do you remember that? Was there a catalyst?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (13:10.313)
It wasn't a specific moment. was during testing, I think, for that green belt. It was just like, okay. I would get nervous for testing like most people do and just something about being in that test and not only performing what we were asked to perform and things like that, but I was actually understanding things and making mental connections to things that I hadn't yet learned. And I was like, wow, this is fantastic.
Andrew (13:14.228)
Mmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (13:39.338)
Even when I was a younger kid, I would say, you know what, I would love to be a student for the rest of my life, but I couldn't afford to take that much school, you know, it was just not going to happen. But martial arts gives me that chance to be a student for the rest of my life. This is amazing. So it's just something just it happened and it became a part of my soul.
Andrew (14:03.732)
When you talk about those early years, I can see the smile on your face. Obviously it was very formative for you. I wonder if the instructor after that year had not come to you and said, why don't you join? Obviously we can't speculate what would have happened. But I seem to think you would have found a way. Yeah.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (14:07.821)
you
"Philly Jenni" Nather (14:27.893)
Eventually, the state of mind that I was in post divorce, I probably would have waited until my kids were much older and it wouldn't have been to the level that I have enjoyed martial arts. My body would have been very different, you know, 20 years later. but I had a chance to at least try to push myself to some limits, you know.
at a younger age before my body started to say, are you doing? What are you doing? Why are you trying to kick that high? What are you doing?
Andrew (14:55.828)
you
Andrew (15:01.62)
So you're training in the school around green belt. You're like, you know what? This is what I want to do. Where did you go next? What was the next part of your Marshall journey? Because you're not a green belt now. So you definitely have progressed. If you started in 2012, it's now 2025. So what happened after that?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (15:26.919)
for the most part I kept taking it, you know, one test at a time, one belt at a time. And instead of putting my sights on having a black belt one day, I knew that I was going to keep going. That hitting black belt didn't mean stopping or anything. So was just, okay, how much can I absorb before my next test? And as I progressed up into higher ranks, there was less curriculum.
and more of an internal aspect that would be a piece of earning the next rank. So instead of thinking, all right, well, I need to be able to do my form. I need to be able to do these one steps. I need to be able to this, that, the other, self-defense, blah, blah. It became, all right, what do I need to understand so that I can get to that next test so that I can get to that next lesson? And The test was all of sudden a barrier between me and continuing.
and I wasn't nervous about it anymore. This was a personal fight for me to get to the next step. This is how I grow. This is how I become a new, better version of myself. And it's weird. Like that anxiety that I felt for testing went away. But that didn't happen in all areas of my life. That anxiety started to shift. All of a sudden I was developing confidence in martial arts.
but the rest of my life didn't feel quite so confident. And that's where things started to pause, I guess, no development outside of the martial arts. And that was a struggle and that was interesting. And yes, there's a catalyst outside of the martial arts as to why things got worse, why my anxiety built up. I guess I'll go into that.
Andrew (17:21.458)
That's up to you.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (17:22.591)
Yeah, the year was 2015. Let me preface this real quick. This is a story that I have told in Modern Moms of Martial Arts. And my ex and I have long since healed some of these old wounds. So I don't want to feel like I'm saying awful things about an awful person. What we went through was two people having a very difficult time who have since grown and
we co-parent like pros like we are phenomenal we're superheroes at this at this point.
Back in 2015, not so much.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (18:05.439)
my ex had some mental health issues where he needed to focus on himself for a little bit. And he asked me if I could take on more of the primary care for the boys. At the time they were living with him so they could stay in school. But when he went through this moment, they moved in with me for a few months. And we took primary care on them for a while.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (18:35.735)
But at some point, my ex, in the middle of whatever was going on in his mind, he started to tell himself a story that I was stealing his children. And all kinds of fighting and nastiness began, and we went through an awful custody battle.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (18:56.416)
Some of the things that he had said and done stirred up a lot of old things from my own personal past. Not only do I not do well with yelling, my dad was a verbal person. He was constantly yelling and there was a lot of trauma from that for me.
but my ex had at one point attempted to attack me. And this was the reason that he and I finally divorced and I had moved out and all that stuff. So again, this was 2010 when this part happened, but he tried to hit me and ended up at the last second, I moved just enough, he missed just enough, he punched the wall behind me instead and something...
turned a light on for him and he was like, what am I doing? So that gave me enough opportunity to get away. But in 2015, when he started having this mental breakdown, all I could see was that fist coming at me again. And I was terrified and I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat properly. I was completely distracted through work. You know, my health took a hit too, because I wasn't taking care of myself. All kinds of things were going wrong.
And part of how I got through all of that was to play the role of perfect mom. It's let me make sure that my kids are always having a good time, make sure that they always have everything they need. Let me make sure that they always, you know, we have arts and crafts time and family time and the beautiful family dinners and I didn't want my kids to see all of the ugliness that was happening between their father and I.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (20:49.003)
and I couldn't completely hide it from them.
And at one point my oldest son had asked me, you why are you trying to take us from dad?
Andrew (20:59.125)
Hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (21:03.701)
It was so hard to hear that.
And I think that was probably the first really grown-up conversation I had with my oldest son.
And at the time I think he was like 13 or 14 or something. And I said, you know what, maybe he can handle some of this. And I didn't want to say all of the actual things that his father had said to me, those kinds of things. But I did kind of remind him that there's enough for me to fear right now that I'm not sure your dad's okay.
having custody of you guys is not taking you away from him, it's just giving me the legal control in case something goes wrong.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (21:52.898)
And was like the anxiety that just came out of all of that stuff that I was going through with them, it stuck with me. And even though that situation, you know, resolved itself and we've moved forward, we found ways to co-parent. Like I said, we're fantastic at this point.
Andrew (21:59.775)
Mm-hmm.
Andrew (22:09.042)
Yeah.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (22:11.633)
For me, there was enough mental and emotional damage through that that stuck with me. And that's why my anxiety and things have gotten so bad.
Andrew (22:22.256)
Now I'm interested to know how, and that's a horrible situation to have gone through. How did that correlate to your training? Did that affect your training in any way?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (22:36.181)
It did. When I was going through all of that stuff, there were times when the ex had threatened to, you know, come grab the kids when I wasn't looking, that kind of thing. The only place I felt safe was in the martial arts school. My kids were there. My, at that time, the fiance was there.
And there were other people that we were training with that I felt if my ex showed up here, we'd be protected. We'd be okay.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (23:11.563)
So that was part of why it felt the safe place.
But while I was training, that analytical mind turned on and it was like, listen, I might be small, but I am going to be mighty. And I trained so much harder, so much more thoroughly to make sure that my techniques worked. It was that much more important to me, not just to protect myself, but to protect my kids. And I don't...
I don't know if he'll ever listen to this, but if my ex is listening to this, sorry. I used to picture your face when I was training. So, but it, it, got me through.
and it helped me fall deeper into the martial arts. So it was sort of a blessing in disguise. Yeah.
Andrew (23:59.892)
Hmm.
Andrew (24:07.612)
Now, and we on the show have heard numerous stories of how martial arts training have helped people get through difficult situations. And I just don't, I don't just mean physical altercations, but difficult times in people's lives that the martial arts have, you know, time and time again, we hear stories on the show about that, about how the martial arts have helped them through. And clearly it helped you.
And so I'm glad that it was there for you to be able to fall back on it and have. Once you got past that, so that was 2015, that was 10 years ago. What's it been like since then?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (24:51.476)
Well, the imposter syndrome never really stopped, but at least I had more confidence in what I was doing in classes and things.
It became more of a barrier for me to teach as opposed to learn. I felt like I could learn anything. I could eventually get my body to do anything that I was asked to do. But my anxiety was, I don't know how to stand in front of a room of people and teach them. And 2017, I got my black belt. By then I had been assisting with classes. And on occasion, I was allowed to run some Saturday classes and things like that, but
never on my own. My then chief instructor would sit on the sides and interrupt me every few minutes telling me what I should have been doing. So I never really got comfortable.
Andrew (25:33.0)
Mm-hmm.
Andrew (25:41.717)
Hmm. Yep, yep. And that makes it difficult because then you start second guessing. You start second guessing everything you're doing. Yep.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (25:47.914)
Exactly. Fast forwarding 2019, I tested for second Dawn. I didn't know at the time, but I was pregnant with Lilith when I tested for that. that was baby number four. I found out a few weeks later. wow. Look at that. But around that time, I started to think, OK, I can
I can push myself a little bit. Maybe I can ask the instructor to step aside. He starts to tell me what to do on the floor. can say, wait a minute, give me a second. And as I started to build that confidence, C-O-V-I-D, and everything shut down. So it sort of stalled my progress as an instructor for a long time.
Andrew (26:33.822)
Yep. Yep.
Andrew (26:39.187)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (26:42.282)
Even after my husband had opened up our school and we got things running here, I still felt like I wasn't good enough to stand out there on the floor by myself. I still felt like somebody needed to tell me exactly what to do because that's all that I had known. Somebody constantly telling me what to do.
Andrew (27:00.99)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (27:03.263)
And I had convinced myself that I didn't know how to think for myself. And I knew that that was nonsense because I was okay with doing like one-on-one or give me a group of three people and we can talk through something on a less formal level. So I know how to teach the techniques. Why was it I couldn't stand in front of a group? Stupid anxiety. So it's weird how it all, you know, it,
It never really went away. I just found different places to put the anxiety, you know? Even now, I'm still working a lot of that out of my system and I'm constantly being called on it. And that's okay. I want to be called on it because I'm not going to learn until I realize what my triggers are, you know? So, but I'm doing my best. I'm a lot better. 2022, I attended my first free training day up in New Hampshire with you guys and I taught a class.
And I mean, I was kind of joking, but very serious. I was like, please put me as the first class so that I can get it done and over with and I can enjoy the rest of the day. And luckily it worked out that I was teaching first class. And I had this list of notes. I almost wrote verbatim everything I wanted to say. And when I got started, I was still...
having trouble breathing and tripping over my own words and I was trying to read my phone and my hand was shaking and I couldn't even read my own notes and I had just taken a moment to pause and I looked at my class I was like I think I need a round of applause and they were so cool and they all stopped and they started clapping for me and I took a deep breath and I was like alright let's get to this and I don't even know at what point during that class I put down my phone I wasn't using my notes I was just winging it and I was like look
I did it! I can do this! even that moment, wasn't the end of the anxiety over teaching, but it certainly helped.
Andrew (29:05.704)
Yeah. How did it change? What did it change for you?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (29:10.347)
I had that confidence. had that example of, yes you can. So this voice that tells you you're not good enough, it's lying to you. You don't have to listen to it. and again, it was still a struggle for a while. I had taken the Matic Level 1 and that was great.
it gave me a little bit more confidence. But even at that point, I still didn't feel like I was ready to ask if I could teach classes here at our school. Shortly after taking MADEC Level 2, my husband had caught the COVID and he needed to sit out. he asked if I could cover classes so he didn't have to cancel again because we'd already had to cancel for some bad weather and things and he didn't want to keep doing that to the school. And I said, I will.
I will teach classes tonight, but you need to give me 10 minutes to go over there and cry. And I did. I went over in the corner and I curled up into a fetal position and I just cried. And I said, there is no reason for you to be nervous about this. You are awesome. Stand up and move. And I stood up and I said, all right, what do the kids need to learn tonight? What is the, what is the, you know, the lesson plans? Let's, let's do this.
Andrew (30:06.644)
You
"Philly Jenni" Nather (30:31.085)
And that was February of 2023. I taught my first night of classes solo.
Andrew (30:42.133)
Now here's a question. uh, you're starting to be an assistant instructor at your old school. 2020 happens that curbs all of that. Fast forward to 2022, you attended free training day. It wasn't yet Marshall summit here in New England. What happened in those two years that made you say, I'm going to drive five ish hours.
Because for those that are just listening, you won't notice that, uh, on Jenny's, uh, photo or picture video, says Philly Jenny Nather. So we can all make the assumption. And obviously I know you're in the Philadelphia area. Free training day is in Keene, New Hampshire. So between 2020 and 2020, November, 2022, what made you decide I'm going to hop in a car and drive five hours.
to go to this event and teach a class that I've never taught before. Solo, talk about that.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (31:50.606)
Alright, let's back up to 2017 very quickly. In 2017, Jeremy had been searching for somebody who could help transcribe some of the more challenging episodes of the podcast. And I had transcription background, because that was sort of a thing that I was doing in my own time to try to get some extra cash.
Andrew (32:05.172)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (32:13.823)
And I had messaged him and said, hey, I'll help you out. Which one do need me to do? I got you. Let's take care of this. And he was so blown away with what I had done with that episode that he continued to ask me to help do more. So obviously by this point, I had known Whistlekick. I caught on to Whistlekick shortly after the podcast started. There were only a few episodes, but hey, Bill Wallace was one of them, so they must be awesome. So I...
Andrew (32:37.524)
Hahaha
"Philly Jenni" Nather (32:40.245)
I knew Whistlekick, I knew I enjoyed it and I wanted to be a part of that world, so this is a small thing I could do for this guy? Yeah, sure, I'll help him out.
later that year I think it was he started working on the martial artist handbook and he wanted me to come on board to help with that project and that was the first book that I helped work on for the not even yet formed book division of whistle kick. So it was it was awesome and not only getting to know Jeremy but getting to know everybody in the sphere.
Andrew (33:05.374)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (33:18.207)
of whistle kick through all of that. There are some really awesome people in this circle. And I had made enough friends with everybody that by 2022, when I was asked for, I don't even know how many times, you know, you should come up, you should come join us, come hang out. I was like, yeah, we're gonna come up this year. I'm gonna make the family come up. We're gonna take the kids out of school. I'm gonna do it. We're gonna do it. And at some point during that
Andrew (33:19.934)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (33:46.45)
summer before that event, I was voluntold that I was teaching. I was like, you know, I can I can do this. I can. Okay. Yes. I again, I cried a little bit because I was nervous. But I said, Okay, I, I love these people. I love what whistle kick stands for. If I'm going to do this, this is where it's going to be. So and it worked great.
Andrew (33:51.252)
That sounds about right. Yeah, that's right.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (34:13.715)
It worked absolutely great. And again, it was somebody else giving me that invitation. I wasn't ready to say it for myself, but somebody opened the door and I basically forced my way through it and said, you can, you can do this.
Andrew (34:29.108)
And from what I wasn't, I wasn't at, I didn't attend your class because I was in, you know, water ground to others. But from what I heard from everybody, it was great. And you have come back and you taught in 2023. You taught in 2024. In fact, you taught more than one class in 2024.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (34:37.218)
Yeah.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (34:49.459)
I did! Three, I taught three days!
Andrew (34:52.37)
Yeah, so, you know, it clearly worked well for you.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (34:57.646)
It did. I think we're glossing over something else that happened because of it. Free Training Day Mid-Atlantic! After I attended the free training day in New Hampshire in 2022, I said, there's no reason this isn't happening in my area. Somebody should do this. And then I looked around and said, well, why can't that be me?
Andrew (35:03.344)
Which is... yeah!
Andrew (35:17.299)
Mm-hmm.
Andrew (35:21.876)
Yeah. So talk about what that journey was like from leaving Keen New Hampshire 2022. Where, what did your mind go to and how did you make that happen?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (35:38.06)
Like I said, there were already a few people that I had met and some amazing friendships that I had. And there's this connection with those people where you just feel like you've always known each other. And the people that I met at free training day felt that way just as much. The people that are drawn to this event are so wonderful. This is the perfect setting. Great people who want to come in and just share and learn and just
They want to connect. They want to be connected. They want to know that, you know, this is something we all have in common. And the way that that felt, that community, my area needs that. My area needs that bad. And I'm sure this is the same for a lot of places across the country and around the world, perhaps, but a lot of the schools in this area, they stick within their own.
click. They stick within their own association or maybe there's just a small handful of other instructors that they will do things with their school and that's it.
Most of the people that I met in my previous association were very much like, is the one way, this is how things are done, this is what we do. Well, okay, maybe you can attend that tournament over there, but we don't associate with that one. And there was just this feeling of why, constantly wondering why can't we share this stuff, what is wrong with that side over there? And as it turns out, there's nothing wrong.
And because I've attended events like Free Training Day, I can tell you there's nothing wrong with hearing how somebody else does things. It's not going to stop me from doing things the way that we're doing it. We're doing our thing for a reason. But it's not the only way. And it sure is fascinating to hear how other people got to their conclusion. And wow, maybe that actually works better. And because I've opened my mind to hearing that, I can now add it over here and incorporate it and
Andrew (37:30.654)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (37:46.889)
maybe together we turn it into something completely different.
Andrew (37:52.105)
So that first year, free training day, mid Atlantic, 2023, uh, it must've gone okay because I looked at the books. I looked at, you know, looked at the calendar and there was a free training day, mid Atlantic, 2024. So what was that year like between 23 and 24?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (39:23.911)
Yes.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (39:38.988)
Well, getting ready for 23 was rough. That was completely new to me. I had no idea what I was doing. basically I was just waiting for somebody to tell me, hey, did you think about this? And I was like, no. And I would quick tackle something. And that was my way of learning. It was like, yeah, this would be great. Let me go tackle this. Okay, cool. And in those conversations,
2023 developed into what it was and
I was so proud. I was so blown away. I had my family there helping out behind the scenes and that, you know, that was a nice little bonding thing for all of us. But there were all these martial artists, people that I didn't know, people who had, you know, no connections otherwise that said, there's this free event happening nearby. Yeah, sure. I'll show up.
And some of those folks came on to teach the year later. And it just, it was so magical. I don't know how to put this feeling into words. And I guess the best start is that that feeling that I had from taking 2022 in New Hampshire and just knowing I wanted that community, that sense of togetherness. And it happened. you know, I...
Andrew (40:48.724)
You
"Philly Jenni" Nather (41:10.859)
I achieved this goal and it felt better than I thought it would. And that's the best way I can sum it up. But people were so moved and they were so inspired by each other and they were so willing to hear each other out and nobody said, that's not how we do it. It was perfect, ego-free environment. And the people that I did know, I got to know deeper. It was so cool. One of my favorite things is how many folks from New England
Andrew (41:13.873)
Mm-hmm.
Andrew (41:30.036)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (41:40.19)
drove down and stayed in hotels and wanted to be a part of it. And Andrew, you were one of them. Now, you were you were the hidden 19th class of the first ever free training day Mid-Atlantic and and taught a class in the arcade at the after party.
Andrew (41:43.891)
Mm-hmm.
That truth be told I was, you're right.
Andrew (41:55.092)
That's true.
Andrew (41:59.829)
Nope. Nope. That is true. so 2022, you went to free training day. Was that your first endeavor kind of, cause what I'm, what I heard was you and your school prior where you were training was very insular, was very kind of stuck to yourself. Um, which, which is common, very common. I'm sure everyone listening will know of schools. Maybe they're in a school that does that. And
"Philly Jenni" Nather (42:18.828)
Yes.
Andrew (42:28.5)
in 2022 you decided I'm going to go to this event. Did that change things for you and start to do other things outside of your group?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (42:41.326)
little bit. Prior to that, the only experience I had outside of my association was a tournament that I attended in Atlantic City. And I met a lot of other Korean style martial artists there and things like that. But the vibe of that tournament was not the same as anything I've ever found at a whistle kick event.
It was still very much, we have to be, you know, perfect technique. Everything has to be this, that, the other thing, and this is how we do things. And in fact, because my school didn't rank students the same way by belt, they weren't even sure which divisions to put me in. And, you know, things sort of, it got confusing there. And eventually the grandmaster was like, just go over here with this group, and just go over here with this group.
I almost fell in the middle of a couple of things for them, a couple of divisions for them. So I still felt out of place. I still felt very awkward and uncomfortable.
But there was at least one other person that I had met in that tournament who I had a fantastic time with, another mom in the martial arts, and we were in our sparring divisions together. just the coolest thing is kicking the snot out of each other and hugging each other afterwards and being like, that was amazing. Thank you. I've never had a fight that awesome. So that was cool. I have one person that I can think of.
And if Trish, you're out there and you remember me, thank you. But yeah, the feeling of...
"Philly Jenni" Nather (44:23.699)
whistle kick and their openness. That was something that I had craved. And I wanted to know like, why is my association so closed off? Are we doing something wrong? Am I actually in fact not qualified? And that almost helped me work on the imposter syndrome a little bit like
Andrew (44:28.51)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (44:46.254)
Let me get into this room of people, these people who I admire, these people that I hold on a pedestal because I love the conversations that I've heard from them. And I'm able to participate. I can do things with them. can, you know, training with them. I can have conversations with them. Oh, okay. There's nothing wrong with me. And it sort of helps break down that imposter syndrome a little.
Andrew (45:12.302)
And did the 2022 free train day lead to other events like between then and now? Like have you gone to other stepped outside of the bubble even more?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (45:20.749)
I have. I have. There's been the All in Weekend was another one and the biggest one for me just happened last summer. I was invited to California to attend a weekend long retreat with a friend that I met in All in Weekend. So the people with the proper mindset, they get it. They understand this is what it's about. Come be part of our family.
Andrew (45:42.194)
Yep. Yep.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (45:51.904)
And because I was able to let down that barrier a little bit and say, you know what, sure, I will fly across the country and I will come see you and hang out because I absolutely love your vibe. Thank you, Matt. That was amazing. And I'm going back again next summer, this summer. So it was, it was wonderful because I was the only person who wasn't officially one of Matt's students.
Andrew (45:58.581)
Thank
Andrew (46:07.604)
you
that's great. That's great.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (46:22.805)
And I still was able to participate and keep up with everybody. And maybe the way that I performed some techniques was a little bit different, but you could still tell it was the same technique. And that was so cool to me, to be able to watch us all move together and do these things. And we are more connected than divided. Absolutely. Absolutely. We need more of that. We need more of that openness.
Andrew (46:47.733)
Now, shifting gears a little bit, because you mentioned it a couple of times, you mentioned the book Modern Moms of Martial Arts, which is a book that you can purchase at Whistlekick. Use the code podcast15, save yourself 15%.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (47:02.249)
the podcast code won't work on that one. I know, I know. But if you keep your eyes open, I do offer discounts on that book from time to time. So follow the blog. Keep your eyes on me. Follow books.
Andrew (47:05.32)
Gah!
Andrew (47:13.533)
Yep.
So talk a little bit about the books that you're involved with and how your involvement in essentially creating our book division, how that happened.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (47:26.957)
Complete accident. Again, it was that martial artists handbook work that I did with Jeremy that started everything and being able to put together a book was something I had always been curious about and having that opportunity just sort of fulfilled that dream for me and was like, yeah, that was so cool. Absolutely. I'd love to do that.
I love books, absolutely adore them, and to be able to help create them was sort of the only piece missing for me. So it was wonderful. So we have many types of books available, the martial artist handbook being one type. It's general topics, so it's not specific to any type of style. It's for all of them. And we try to keep things that open when we create books.
Another type of book that we have like the 12 months to health. It's a daily book. And what I mean by that is every day you wake up, you read a page from your book. And for one solid month, what you're reading about is encouraging you to take a new habit and make it part of your routine. Day number one.
you're gonna start drinking water when you wake up, a nice glass of water. And for 30 days, we give you 30 reasons, one reason per day on why you should do this and why you should make this habit. And at the end of 30 days, now you've got a habit of waking up and drinking a glass of water. And then you start chapter two and you add on another small habit. And we do the same thing where we give you another 30 really good reasons why you're doing this for yourself and what parts of your health are gonna improve thanks to doing this habit.
And by the end of the year, hey, look at that, you've just developed 12 new habits. I feel like that's one of our favorites in the selection because it's so broad. It's for everybody, whether you train or not. Another set that I really am proud of is the hop kick books, the master hop kick series. Thank you, Jenny. See you for all of your amazing work. And Chris record as well. Yes, that's hop kick folks. The hop kick series is
"Philly Jenni" Nather (49:40.446)
wonderful and here I am a grown adult enjoying it just as much as the kids that we read to and we have brought that hop kick series to a point where for book number one which is titled beginnings there is actually a mat chat guide that goes along with it so folks who like to do mat chats in their schools you can read the chapter which is only a few pages long and then you go to the mat chat guide and it has a list of topics that come out of that
that chapter that can relate to your martial arts class and a series of questions to help dive further into that topic and relate it back to what your students are learning in your school. And the best part about it is it's written to work in a martial arts school or in a regular school, school, school. So everybody can use it this way. It's wonderful. And some folks in the school system, they like to do things where all of their lessons are tied in across the curriculum all day long.
we have a way to do that in this guide as well. We have two books in that series now and book three is underway. So hopefully we'll be able to release book three soon and you'll have a whole trilogy of hop kick books. And I'm not gonna lie, when I read the first book, I was previewing it on my lunch break at work trying to...
to get through all of the editing and things. And I was sitting there in my cafeteria at work, bawling my eyes out because there is some really emotional, amazing, fantastic stuff going on. it's powerful and everybody needs to read it. And I don't want to spoil it. So I'm trying to be very careful about what I say because you have to read it. Modern Moms is one of the newer books in the collection.
Andrew (51:18.196)
Hahaha!
"Philly Jenni" Nather (51:30.175)
And it is probably the one that I am currently most proud of. And there is a dad's version coming soon. Stay tuned. But I got together with, was it 14 other moms, and each of us told a story about what it's like to be a mom who trains in the martial arts with or without her children. The experiences we have, the struggles that we go through every day. Do we take care of ourselves? Do we take care of our families?
Andrew (51:33.108)
Mm-hmm.
Andrew (51:51.593)
Mm-hmm.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (51:59.466)
What do we do? How do we manage to get to the mats? Each class. Well, what is it that we have to overcome to allow ourselves that space to take care of our needs? And there were some really powerful stories in this book. And what I want all moms to know is that you're not alone. We've all been there. We've all been through it.
no matter how perfect you think someone's life may look and how great they may look at as a mom, they've got their struggles too. And we're all here, we're all supporting each other and we are here to lift each other up and keep going. And for us to have that connection with the martial arts as well was a really powerful thing.
It's not necessary to read the book, but it certainly expresses how martial arts has helped each of us overcome those obstacles that every mom faces.
Andrew (52:53.724)
Mm-hmm.
And you know, there are other books I know I've looked through. There are books of episodes from guests we've had. Maybe this episode will be a book. I know them. I'll let you know who that is. So what's next for you? Like, where do you go from here?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (53:09.161)
Maybe. I'll have to talk to the director.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (53:22.923)
My free training day world is expanding. So yes, I am hosting free training day, Mid-Atlantic 2025, September 20th. Information is starting to go out on that. So if you're not already, get into the email list so that you get all of the updates. But I'm also gonna be taking, go ahead.
Andrew (53:32.926)
you
Andrew (53:42.804)
And I would say that's important because the listener might be hearing this in 2026 when the 25 event has happened. But get on the email list now, because it's still going to be there. And you can find out about all of the future ones. But continue.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (53:59.032)
Correct, thank you, Andrew. My role is also going to start taking me as the free training day team member on site for other free training day events. So little known fact to those of you who don't plan and host these events is we need to have a free training day team member on site to help run and control things and they, you know, make sure everything is kosher. And up until now, it's been just you and Jeremy, right, Andrew?
Andrew (54:26.077)
Yep
"Philly Jenni" Nather (54:27.529)
And starting this year, I'm going to be the third. So I'll be traveling to other free training days and as much fun as I have in New Hampshire and obviously the best one in Mid-Atlantic. I'm going to have that much fun with even more people across the country now. And I cannot wait. I can't wait.
Andrew (54:51.236)
Awesome, awesome. And any new books coming out that you can talk about?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (54:57.293)
The modern dads is probably the one that I can say the most about right now. It is going to be similarly done and I'll have some announcements coming out in the very near future. What I will do is collect stories from the dads who train and what their life is like, the things that they go through and how they make sure that they get to the mats time in, time out and what benefits they're getting. What they can take from...
being a dad and apply to martial arts and vice versa. And I will be looking for submissions from those dads and it can be anybody, anybody who is a dad and trains can submit. I want everybody to understand that same feeling that yes, this is challenging. This is not easy, this is not natural.
But for many of us, is necessary and okay to take care of ourselves at least as well as we take care of our families.
Andrew (56:01.768)
Now, if people want to connect with you, how should they do that? How should they get in touch?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (56:06.463)
The fastest way is through the email, which is books at whistlekick.com. But you can also find Jenny Nather on Instagram and Facebook. I believe my handle is at jennie nather or at jennie nather 397.
Andrew (56:23.833)
You
"Philly Jenni" Nather (56:25.077)
I think. If not, I will update you if that's not accurate. I don't usually look for myself, so it's been a while.
Andrew (56:27.186)
You must use it a lot.
Andrew (56:35.38)
So, you know, just a minute, I'm going to throw it back to you to end our episode and leave our audience with something. But for those listening, I hope you enjoyed this episode. Please consider going to Whistlekick Martial Arts Radio to find out all of the other episodes we've done. Something I didn't mention at the beginning, we have a Patreon and you can help support the show, which is our goal to connect, educate and entertain traditional martial artists of the world.
does not happen for free. You get to experience this for free. We do not charge and put our episodes behind a paywall, but the content does not, it is not free. It costs money to actually produce this show. So anything you can help do to help support the show through our Patreon, which is patron.com forward slash whistle kick.
for as little as $5 a month. That's it, five bucks. Even that little bit will really help out the show. And if you could do more, that would be great. But Jenny, thank you so much for being here. What do you want to leave our audience with today?
"Philly Jenni" Nather (57:45.207)
Thank you.
"Philly Jenni" Nather (57:50.327)
The world needs more kindness. So, be kind.
If it's a choice between being right or being kind, please be kind.
And when you're being kind, don't forget to include yourself.