Episode 270 - Mr. Paul Millholen
Mr. Paul Millholen is a Taekwondo practitioner and instructor from Connecticut.
For me, I was always able to, when I was teaching, just gonna hit that switch and you know, kinda take myself out of my own body for that hour forty five minutes... and just dedicated it to the students...
Mr. Paul Millholen - Episode 270
Our guest today appeared recently on one of our Thursday shows when we had a chat about martial arts camps, seminars, and other events. Yes, today we are joined by Mr. Paul Millholen who started his journey to the martial arts as a child. Like most children, Mr. Millholen set his attention to other sports, but unlike most children, he returned. Today, he’s a passionate instructor who cares a lot about the community that he serves. Listen to find out more about his story!
Show Notes
On this episode, we mentioned:Bill Wallace EpisodeTerry Dow EpisodeBenny the Jet Urquidez, Shihan Christine Bannon Rodrigues, Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Tony Jaa, Richard Hubbard, Rory Miller
Show Transcript
You can read the transcript below or download here.Jeremy Lesniak:Hey everybody. Thanks for coming by this is a whistlekick martial arts radio episode 270. Man, as I say those numbers as they keep going up, it continues to blow my mind that I’m still here, I’m still doing the show and not only are people still listening, but more people are listening. That makes me feel good. Honestly, this is one of the best parts not only of my job, but of my life. And today were joined by a great friend of mine Mr. Paul Millholen. Some of you may remember Mr. Millholen from an episode just a couple weeks ago that involved a what can we call it, a chat. He and I were in Atlantic city for an event, I know Mr. Mulholland well as my Superfoot training partner in fact just a couple hours ago he and I were training together. So, I rushed back to get this done so we can get the editing done on this episode. The timing of its kind of funny but I think you're gonna like this one. Mr. Mulholland is a great guy is become a good friend and I know how much martial arts means to him. I won't say anymore, I’ll let you form your own opinions after listening to this episode so let’s welcome them onto the show. Mr. Millholen, welcome to whistlekick martial arts radio.Paul Millholen:Hello! Long time no see.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah, it’s been a little while. Well listeners you may recognize Mr. Miller: as someone who was on the air recently. We did a quick chat as we were driving back from new jersey from Sifu Allan Goldberg’s event and I don't remember the episode number off that but will link to it from the show notes. So, usually weekly get these kinds of more structured conversations in before we have a guest on for other reasons but that's just not the way they work this time. We happen to be in the car and we debriefed.Paul Millholen:Yeah, I was able to [00:02:17.02] time so, I’m looking forward to this.Jeremy Lesniak:Good. Alright. Well you know, its martial arts show, were gonna talk about martial arts and we need some context. We need some context for who you are and how martial arts became part of your life. So, let's do that first why don’t you go back tell us how you discover martial arts and you know, kinda what hooked you in.Paul Millholen:To be honest I’m not too sure. I think my parents wanted me to something do cause I first started when I was around seven and it was funny cause I know you're kind of a hip hop fan it reminds me a quote from Nas, he said, you know you can be whatever you want to be, when you're ready to be it. I definitely wasn't ready for the martial arts then cause I met a friend there and meet him kinda just you know, we goofed off a lot, got a lot of trouble. But you know, those skills that you know, I learned at seven like the break falling, in judo we did a lot of that and then so when I was kinda mature enough to handle the martial arts, I actually retain the some of the skills that I learned when I was really young. So, that was kinda impressive but yeah, I’ve been basically doing it my whole life, started like I said around seven and this kinda judo flashlight karate type mix. And the cool thing that I liked about it was, it was to the YMCA and I know a lot of people think that you know, I don't have a good instructor something that you need to know go to a legit full-time school with a place but, you know I couldn’t talk highly of Mr. Susi it was his name that you know just taught couple nights week out of YMCA that was a great experience and you know, kinda off the beat path like I said, most people would like to just you know, go to a standalone spot.Jeremy Lesniak:We’ve had at least, I am not any names cause I don’t wanna leave anybody out but I’m thinking of at least two guest we had on the show who teach out of a YMCA and I’ve known people over the years who have taught in some very strange places. You know, church basements, outside in parks, you know and not everybody's going to resonate with the you know, a really formal, neon lit, seven days a week kind of pro school. I mean, some people want that, some people want something to little more subdued if that’s the right word.Paul Millholen:And actually, that's how I got my start teaching full time also was before I got my physical school, I was teaching at a community center which I still do you know once a week you know, for people that wanna train out of budget or just don't have the time cause its only Monday nights. And it's something that I still do to kinda you know give back and whatever they have like you have a 35 year kinda anniversary thing that I did a demo for and some free stuff so, yeah it was fun times and you know I still kinda do that once a week just to you know, keep that going cause I do enjoy it and it’s a nice kinda break away from the regular teaching, different spot and teach.Jeremy Lesniak:Nice. How did you make the transition from student to instructor?Paul Millholen:Basically, like I said after I’d train for a couple years when I was seven, I took a break, I did other things soccer, basketball, kinda your run of the mill American type stuff but then I went to kind of a rough middle school and cause I’m from Willimantic and some people might have known it from your like 10-20 years ago, 50 minutes to the thing about my town called heroin town which you know gave it a bad rap but at the same time there is kind of a you know, epidemic going out with drugs and just kinda not nice stuff. I mean, I’m not talking bad about it, it’s an awesome place, I’m really glad I grew up there but at the same time I’m not sure [00:06:22.22] saying something that is not. So, yeah when I was about 13 I realized, I probably should pick up some self-protection skills so I went back to the judo place. But at that time my dad bought me the, I don’t know if you remember, you know Bruce lee had a four-volume set? They’re really short books like one had like orange cover, yellow cover, blue cover, whatever and yeah, I picked up one of that books and basically it was like the first one which would just treat self-defense so in all that he didn't do any fancy wrist locks or throws was mostly sidekick to the shin, hammer fist to the face and stuff like that kinda what you get to see at a Krav Maga type stuff nowadays. But so, you know, reading that book, I kinda wanna do more striking so, I was looking for you know, a little bit something else which nowadays I love joint locks and throws, so it’s kinda interesting how you know, you kinda bounce around with martial arts you don’t always have to have one thing and then said so. Anyway me, my buddy causes he was getting picked on, we did Thai boxing first and it was at like next to a college Yukon, and we were just kinda getting beat up, we're 13 we get beat up by you know, 18-20 year olds, 30-year-olds, there's really no instruction to the class except for jump in the ring and keep your hands up. So, we decided that wasn’t our cup of tea. So then we went to taekwondo and yeah at the time it was, it was kinda perfect cause the school just started up, we were just not interested so [00:08:03.24] answer question about how I start teaching, I was you know this guy's first pretty much a student and you know, me and my buddy just kinda gravitated to the training and we didn’t really have anything else going on at the time so, you know, we were training four or five days a week just straight and did that for a few years and then you know, became black belt and then just started kinda trading a [00:08:28.28] for the fee because you know it's kinda tough paying for it. So, you know kinda one of those old-school you clean the toilets and teach and you get to train for free. That's how I started teaching.Jeremy Lesniak:You've talk about during that gap when you stop training that you are playing traditional American sports, basketball etc. But when you started training again, you left all that entirely and I just want talk about that for a second cause that such a transitional point. Anybody that's owned a school knows that by the time somebody hits you know, it's usually somewhere between 10 and 12, kids will bail on martial arts statistically it happens all over the place, all the time to pursue you know, generally team sports that their friends are into and I’m wondering if there's some wisdom in their first school owners.Paul Millholen:Yeah. I totally you don't have the same issue that you just mentioned was, cause I guess my, maybe not niche or what everyone say is that I’m pretty good with kids so, I have a young demographic majority speaking. And yeah like you said, it's [00:09:46.10] like I would assume to be a bit later like around teenager that kids you know dropout, but I’ve been finding what you just mentioned around 10 or 11 where you know, they'll either you know, quit altogether or they just take a few months off which you know, I’m all about cross training and how you know, one thing helps another but it is tough when you know, you have students and you just seen progress and grow into great people and then you know, they just disappear because of [00:10:13.12] yeah, it’s very frustrating and they [00:10:19.07] cause I don't. I just got kinda say, oh you know you'll be missed and hopefully we'll see you soon. Or you know I just try and say listen you don’t have to train every day, you know, even if you just make it once a week just to kinda keep your foot in the door cause I know how easy it is, once you stop doing something, you know, for it to get back. You know I used to be really big in lifting weights a few years back and I was really cut and stuff like that and then I just [00:10:45.14] whatever excuse I stopped and it's been real tough getting that routine back.Jeremy Lesniak:Well, at a short time ago, I’m trying to remember when that was, let's call it a year. Cause it was more than a couple months, I did an episode sensei Jared Wilson and I from martial thoughts had a chat about and I don't remember if our intention was to get into this but we talked about teenagers in the martial arts and it was about an hour long and we batted some stuff back and forth in the feedback from that episode was pretty good. People writing and saying, yes, I found that some of your ideas do work or I’m gonna try this or whatever so we'll link that in the show notes for anybody that might be new whistlekickmartialartsradio.com you can find the show notes and I’ll make sure we get the other episode that you and I did as well as the other stuff that we talk about. But yeah, that was fun because we just kinda sat there and batted it back and forth and you know, I have limited experience running a school, you know, I did it for a couple years but because of whistlekick I’ve traveled around a lot and have been part of a lot of schools on my own and visit a lot of schools and I see a lot of things that work well and a lot of things that really you know, don't seem to work well and one of the things that is interesting is that, there is no one right answer to that problem.Paul Millholen:And I that's definitely I feel about teaching styles to you know, that's not one right cause I know some people are very you know, strict and they still beat you with the sticks if you don't bend your knees and offer stuff like that and there's some that kinda looks like a playground and there are some that do no combination of both. So yeah, just like with the teacher style like you know whatever fits your personality.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah, I agree. There are different styles and different ways of teaching the styles because people themselves are different and you know for anyone that says it should always be a certain way, well that's to say that all people should be a certain way and I don’t want to live in a world that has a bunch robots where everybody is exactly the same. Now we've got some context, we know bit about who you are and where you started and why and everything. But let's switch it into story time. I've heard some your stories and I know you got a lot more that I haven't heard but of course listeners haven't heard any, so I love for you to tell us, you know let's say your favorite story from your martial arts time.Paul Millholen:Oh. Favorite story has to be me in the, our instructor bill Superfoot Wallace. That’s has gotta be hands down you know my number one experience that I’ve had because you know, when I was like I said, I got back into it in middle school and back in the day, you know black belt magazine was huge. I mean, it's still is, probably the only magazines that kind of surviving the times now but there used to be this big company called panther productions and they would you know have like a deal six page ads of full ads of their video lines. I remember picking up you know his VHS is [00:13:58.58] we use VHS back in the day and I actually used to have his picture up in my middle school locker. And I told him that I didn't tell him that you know next to him I had a picture of beavis and butthead also. But yeah, I mean probably just me and him because I used to have all these tapes and watch all the fights so meeting him was a you know, dream come true.Jeremy Lesniak:Nice nice. And of course, you know that's to tell you and I have gotten to know each other through hanging out with him and being kind of the de facto younger crew in new England. I say that sarcastically to some of the guys that already a couple years older than us. What are you doing when you're not training? What hobbies? What are you into? [00:14:54.15] used to be in weight training.Paul Millholen:Yeah. This might sound, maybe sad or maybe inspiring however you wanna look at it but you'll basically, I just spent my free times you know training. So, I really don't, I mean, you know on the weekends, right now I’m a stay home dad during the day and I teach at night then the weekends you know, if I’m not watching one of my kid's your soccer games or basketball, I’m either out going to different events like your event which was a lot of fun. You know I always spend my weekend like you just you know ask me oh, I got this thing going on a training day on a Saturday, I said yeah, I got nothing else going on, you what I mean? So, I went up in and that was just a really fun time and I know I pick up the shirt but you know my wife always feel, I was guy was able to wear it once but, that was a really fun time and that's kind of what I do. You know, travelling there or going up to our other instructors' place you know Terry Dow or I go up to New York to train with Robert Mcewing who's an aikido master. So, that's kind of what I do with my free time and if I’m not hanging out my family I’m just you know, training or going to events centered around training. So, that I can either be sad or inspiring. I don't know.Jeremy Lesniak:There certainly some dedication there and some reflection of how passionate you are about martial arts. Then you mentioned your wife and you do have a family and you are not the only one in your family the trains, are you?Paul Millholen:No and that’s actually how I met my wife was, I was training her kids which I know can be controversial but, I know that other people in the past they have been kind of in the same situation where you know, maybe not the most ethical thing or whatever but you know, it worked out so I can't complain and yeah, she has, I have some step kids and they all train and actually everyone has their black belts. And her first kid, who I started training she's basically my uke and my assistant when you know I got to be in the office take care of phone calls or business. You know, she’s out there teaching class and then she goes out to all these events and help me out and actually last times she'd trained outside was with you at the train station doing a sparring.Jeremy Lesniak:She's good, she solid she got solid feet and I mean that in both ways.Paul Millholen:Yeah, she actually you know she was 2nd degree now under me in taekwondo and then she got a black belt under Mr. Wallace last symposium so, she's no slouch there and she puts a lot of her free time training because you know, I mentioned Robert McEwan just like five minutes ago. He was a person I met doing a seminar with super foot and he kinda like my style so he said, you can come up and train at the advanced class every once a month on a Sunday and then I got good with one of his students in Connecticut. We started training and then my stepdaughter Daniel started training and s meet her right now or in the middle testing for purple belts under aikido. So were still working.Jeremy Lesniak:Mix it up. Its good stuff. I'd love for to tell us about a time where stuff didn't go well. You know, martial artist we’ve got this kinda unique toolkit that we can dip into and I love for you to tell us how you handled something that was rough. Whether that be physically or mentally.Paul Millholen:Yeah, on the mental thing, hopefully I’m answering this correctly cause I have a couple take on this, is I don't, for a while you know [00:19:06.14] of kind of a, I was in a really big kind of plateau where my instructor at the time was just feel kinda preoccupied with family stuff and he kinda just you know, he had his set of skills and that was it and he wasn't really ill interested in teaching more or a anything like that, so I kinda hit a level where just stayed there and I was briefly brought in the school at the time, you know teaching six days a week and taking care of office stuff, teaching classes [00:19:40.26]. I mean, I gave back a lot and that was probably like five years straight of just teach, teach, teach, teach without really learning which made me pretty good at teaching. You know, you can't keep that long and without dealing with a hundred different types of people so you how to deal with really aggressive people, how to deal really shy people, you know extroverts and introverts know you name it. Autistic or Asperger’s, and everything. So, you know, that was a really on the plus side you know, my teaching, I kinda honed it in but the same time you know, I just kind of just plateaued at a personal level for a long, long time. That's why, you know maybe, what people hear that I’m doing this and the third they say, oh wow you've kinda overdoing it but you know maybe, I’m making up for years of just kind of a, you know, doing the same thing day in and day out.Jeremy Lesniak:Okay. There's really wrong way to answer any of these questions. They’re all jumping off point just to make you talk, you know that.Paul Millholen:But I do have to say, you know with the, you know, how it has helped me was that you know, training has always been there and you know I been doing it now for 21 years straight without taking a break so you know it’s been there with the goods [00:20:59.08] like you know, I’ve had best friends come and go your girlfriends come and go wife’s come and go, go parents come and go. You know, my dad died and he was sick for a while with a brain tumor and you know it’s very easy if ever you dealt with the kind of your big illnesses if you just dwell on it and you know, just start feeling sorry for yourself or the persons having to or feel sorry about everything in general. But for me I was always able to when I was teaching just got hit that switch and you know kinda take myself out of my own body for that hour 45 minutes whatever it is and just dedicate it to the students or me if training. And kind of you know get out of it and then you know, after class and you can deal with okay I gotta go back to the hospital, I gotta do the [00:21:46.25] but you know, so training is always been that thing where you know, it is really good at kinda getting me out of a slump or just a depressed time. It’s just alright, help others or go to class and sweat it out and then come back and think about it or whatever.Jeremy Lesniak:For sure. Now, we've talked a bit about some of the variety of people that you have around you that you've learned from, that you are still learning from, the folks that you call your instructors. When you think about your philosophy of martial arts, your approach, who's been the most influential person on that?Paul Millholen:Like I had to say, influential, I just have to say Superfoot because just idolizing him as a teenager and then you know, going to all these events and the funny thing is like he's, I don’t know if people really realize that, he's just so knowledgeable, it’s just it’s ridiculous because you know like how you mentioned out [00:22:57.26] you ran a school for little while but you were kinda downplaying it and you know Superfoot, I think you know when he was telling that story out in the, in Alabama, I think he talked about how he ran a school for little bit like in his college days. I'm not sure, that story went all over the place but I think he mentioned how he had that school for little bit or remember that?Jeremy Lesniak:I do. That was... I don’t remember if it was that specific story but I know that Elvis came to him and said I want you to open a school and that's what ultimately got him to move.Paul Millholen:Yeah and you know, the funny thing is that he has given me probably a ton of advice on just how to run a school which you wouldn't think that a guy who maybe, you would say never had a school or 50 years ago what it would be that you know, reliable to take advice from. But yeah, it’s just crazy the last couple years you know, he says oh maybe don't try this or I will do that or you know, this is a trend that that he sees cause I mean, he goes all over the place so you know, he sees what works, what doesn't work. What makes school successful, what you know is there [00:24:13.27] or whatever so uhm. Yeah, I would just say even though you know I’ve only known for a couple years you know is that just that influence especially I think you know he caught me at a time where... I'm always kind up and down about the school cause it’s just that, I really do miss the days of when you were just a martial artist and all you had to do is just show up to class and do your best. Those kinda innocent days of that and then when it becomes a business and a lot of responsibility, it can take a lot of the fun out or the, however you want to put it, out of it and it replaced it with all this other kinda headache stuff. So, I was kinda getting burnt out and you know when came by, it just kind of let that fire of uh, alright this is what I do and you how can I make a better.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah, he is incredibly knowledgeable and I don't think there are too many people who... I'm gonna make a claim there is probably no martial arts instructor today who gets more face time with more people. The sheer number of people that he works with across a year, no he's not working with them every week or every month, but just a number of people that he works with at seminars. I mean he's doing well over 100 seminars in a year.Paul Millholen:Yeah definitely.Jeremy Lesniak:You know. An average of 40 to 50 people at each one, I mean that there is 5 to 10,000 people he is physically working with across the year so yeah, he's a very smart man and he's gonna pick up a lot about what works for people and yeah, we're both pretty lucky and you certainly are smart fir taken his advice that's for sure.Paul Millholen:Yeah and I... You know almost comes kinda out of nowhere where you know, it is funny how just kinda these nuggets just fall out and you know, it’s very interesting and fun so yeah.Jeremy Lesniak:If you have the chance to train with somebody else, somebody that you've never trained with and we'll even let you train with dead people. Who would you wanna train with?Paul Millholen:To be honest, I was actually really bummed that I wasn’t able to train with benny the jet could because he's the one where you know. I remember my old man used to take me to the Chinatown in Boston we get like the bootleg martial arts movies because back when I was a teenager it wasn't like the big market is now with Jet Li and you know, Jackie Chan was just kinda getting popular. But you know, it really was in a kind of a mainstream thing. So, we'd go there was a spot new London we'd go to pick up vhs and its often and I remember you go to my favorite movies were that meals on wheels and dragons forever by Jackie Chan and you know, benny the jet was the main bad guy in both of them. Those fight scenes were just probably two of the best and he was there a couple weekends ago but me and you are preoccupied so I know we watched it but kinda wanted to jump in and train with him but I didn't get a chance to.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah, he certainly a legend in his own right and you know listeners, here on the show we talk about a lot of different stuff, we talk about a lot of different people and one of the things one of the most fun things for me and it was only about 10 seconds long from that event down in Atlantic city a few weeks ago was watching the interaction between Mr. Wallace and Mr. Urquidez. Bill Wallace and benny the jet have known each other for decades and so you know, there's one group of us kinda going down the escalator, one gets ready go back up the escalator and the two of them just start talking. You know, and 30-40 people around but in that moment, you just saw the mutual respect and friendship of two people that have lived similar lives for decades. And I think that there is an understanding of someone else that comes when you've done that and so for me just getting to watch the two of them just have a real quick chat. And they weren't talking about anything substantial, they were kind of you know teasing each other the way you or I would tease each other. But there was there was a different quality to it and for me that will certainly highlight.Paul Millholen:I remember the exact point that you mentioned are yeah, it was special to watch kinda like the, just the looks on their faces toward each other. There was a deep your admiration and respect that you don’t see that much nowadays.Jeremy Lesniak:Well people don’t tend to have known each other for that long. We live in a different world people move around, they don't dedicate their lives to one thing as often as they once did. We just spend some and we've been talking a lot today about people that made their bones on competition and being great in the ring. What's your history with competition?Paul Millholen:Yeah that was one thing where... It used to kind of a sore subject cause I used to feel like a you’re watching a movie on the waterfront with Marlon Brando without whole I could've been a contender type thing cause...Jeremy Lesniak:Okay is that where that line is from?Paul Millholen:Yeah. So, basically like I came from a very kind to close off organization where it was like three schools. It started two and three but they only did stuff with their own people I guess so you know, I got to a certain age when I was like 17 or 18 where you know, I kinda shot up in height and my skills are pretty good so yeah no one wanted to spar me and my thing was that without my favorite thing and in competitions like I mean it’s all good forms and breaking and but I always had some kind of weird your love for sparring because, you know, I guess with forms is very subjective you can say oh this person had better breathing or that person a better stance but you know, if you're in a fight or a sparring, you know pretty much who won and who didn't. So, I kinda like that aspect little bit but just the thing about you know, when you got to you know, people trying to throw kicks at your full speed, you know that really takes your awareness to right there at that exact moment where you're not thinking about you know, what you gonna watch tonight or you know what am I gonna have for dinner. You know, you're just thinking about how can I not get my had taken off. One story I like to say was the last time I competed in like a pretty big tournament, I was out against someone who was probably training 10 more years than me. We're like the same age but he was probably the one that trains sine he was like five and I he only came up to about my shoulder so I had the height advantage but you know, the referees said go and I blinked at the wrong time and I got kicked right in the nose and still you could probably see it it's a little bit off centered and I was just thinking like wow I just blinked at the wrong time. I don’t have any thoughts that are outside of what's going on right now and you know not many things that I think people can do in the daily life that they had that same kind of focus and concentration that you can get from sparring. So, you know as far as my favorite but unfortunately, I was in an organization that was just you know, very close, no one wanted to spar me so I went you know all through my 20s not sparring and then. Now you know linking up with it with master Terry Dow and he has fight nights at his school that I don't mean you went to and check out what was awesome time. You know, so, I am thinking about that dipping my feet back in there it’s just you know, kinda tough, people talk about ring rust five no I have ring rust for 15 years or whatever it's kinda tough to get back into the saddle but something that I haven't ruled out so you know, I might jump in the ring one of these days.Jeremy Lesniak:What's your I guess approach to competition in your school? Is that something you encourage your students, discourage your students you're indifferent to it, like why is there may be some insight there?Paul Millholen:Yeah. Cause my upbringing you know, it was only one tournament a year which you know, means that there wasn't really a big focus on it and then like I said that for you know years and years and years I couldn't even compete so I kind of ill put a sour taste in my mouth about competition cause the people having fun and doing their thing and I’m over here just you know judging or are being ringleader what have you, given out medals. And so, you know, it was very frustrating but now, you know I just got to keep my ear open then and you know an instructor that mean you train with [00:33:43.53] when we train with the Christine bannon Rodrigues that took their [00:33:51.51] I’m really bad with names so I apologize [00:33:56.42] anyways, he's having a tournament actually this Saturday that I’ve been try to get my crew prep for which. What I like is that it's different if not wtf style which is what I’ve been doing for years and in the last few years I been doing kinda kickboxing but now I have been incorporating point fighting which is you know, very different and you know I’ve been just having fun learning you know, the point fighting rules and kind of their strategies cause as you know like things can have a common similarities but that there are from big differences that make it interesting and I’ve been enjoying learning a different types of sparring so yeah I just been kinda keeping an ear out at we basically my school averages maybe once a year. But you know I kinda leave it up to the students, I don't pressure them. I think sometimes, if you're certain bout you need to do you know this this every year there's two tournaments or whatever but I’m kinda more it off they want oh that's great if not that's fine because I definitely see the benefits of it and I think you've done whole issues of you know the benefits of tournaments but at the same time I’ve had it were back fire were people have bad experiences and they just stop training cause they think that's what the you know, what training is about and is not out of just one day out of your life but some people they take it serious and they go on to something else.Jeremy Lesniak:Yes, if it was cut and dry it would be controversial subjects.Paul Millholen:Yeah and you know basically you know when doing different style, I’m just telling my crew right now just have some fun with it and try learn something because you know whenever you leave it to the judges maybe it's a rule that you know, they know more about that we don't or whatever like you know, don't get to kinda caught up with the results but just the experience.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah, for sure. Let’s talk about movies and you've mention some movies and I know personally that you're in the martial arts movies. What are your favorites?Paul Millholen:Yeah, my favorites are like those that you know late 80s, early 90s Jackie Chan films. I was big in the Jet Li, he had that one fist of legend which I remember seen that like that, you know, the fight scenes and that and I dropped my jaw and of course you know the force of one with our boy in it and Chuck Norris that one is a classic. And then I think for now just it's always fun watching like the Michael Jai White movies and you know spotting when he does the you know; super foot moves techniques like that. Was that blood and bone? That one was just an awesome movie with the choreographing and everything so yeah, I think you know for back in the day was you know Jackie Chan and Jet Li, now is probably Michael Jai White and Tony Jaa even though he hasn’t done too much lately but he's always entertaining fight scenes to watch.Jeremy Lesniak:I hope that something happens and we see more of Tony Jaa. We need, we need him. I will say.Paul Millholen:Yeah, remember I was talking to one year your past guest, Greg Campbell and he was a big fan of john wick number two. [00:37:24.11] good fight scenes in that which I haven’t seen yet but I know that was the one that he recommended for me so I have to check it. I'm not sure if you saw that one yet but you said that was a good one.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah, it's fantastic. I mean there it... Yeah, it's funny to to look at Keanu Reeves now John Wick and there was just a commercial that popped up on TV that I saw over the weekend, he was standing on a motorcycle.Paul Millholen:Yeah, I saw that. From the super bowl, I think.Jeremy Lesniak:Right? And then to think of Keanu reeves 20 years ago you know, when he was doing movies like speed,Paul Millholen:Yeah. [00:38:02.17]Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah and just you know, just being a goofball and just watching how he's become a bit more of a serious and talented actor and then they gave him such incredible fight scenes. I don't know how much that stunt work, that action work he was doing himself, but it's convincing and it's completely changed my perspective whether it’s john wick one or two they're both fantastic movies and you almost have to classify them as martial arts movies because there's so much action, so much combat going on.Paul Millholen:Yeah definitely.Jeremy Lesniak:I actually just saw black panther last night and the fight scenes in there? Phenomenal.Paul Millholen:Did you ever finish that thor movie? I know me and you have watched half of it.Jeremy Lesniak:No. Mr. Millholen is referencing everyone is that, when we were in Atlantic city we tried watching the new thor movie and it was it was too goofy and when starting.Paul Millholen:Too much like guardians of the galaxy they are kinda.Jeremy Lesniak:But not done well. If anybody out there really love that movie, I’m sorry I didn't I might try it again.Paul Millholen:I do have to say. I know you always ask about movies but, one thing which I like to mention is that you know, I used to watch a lot of tv. I mean I still do but, I used to two. That was a [00:39:20.20] joke. But anyways, what I liked was that a show called wmic masters which I’m not sure if you know about it or not but that's why you know when we met Christine bannon Rodriguez you know that was oftentimes she was in that show and it was like a scripted kinda kid's show where it would, they'd have a fight but then like a moral to the story and it is a great thing and that the thing that kinds thinks about is that it has been released on dvds. It’s the show that I’ve kind of want to introduce my step kids to. Cause around that age 9, 10, 11, I think you know is perfect for them. I know she's have a tournament up in April where [00:39:59.56] gonna be a wmic master reunion which I might be away for that but I’m hoping that I can maybe, come up a day then just check those out cause those are people I used to watch when I was pretty young and that was one of my favorite shows. So, I know it’s not a movie but that was a martial arts tv show that I used to watch like religiously back in the day.Jeremy Lesniak:Yeah. I mean, when you, when you look at that show and the number of impressive people that were on that show, just for kind of the way the world saw martial arts. And the fact it was on tv we know it wasn't huge budget or anything but pretty impressive. Obviously would've liked to have seen more seasons of it but maybe something like that will pop up again.Paul Millholen:Yeah, I’m... You think they would've by now but I don’t know. I am not too sure what kinda kids have nowadays for their martial arts now that I know [00:41:02.32] is a big thing but I don’t know how the fight scenes [00:41:06.11] Lego people but you know, I know that’s kinda like the new thing.Jeremy Lesniak:How about books? You mentioned a few books as we've talk today, are there books that you would recommend to the listeners? You think everybody should read this one or these two?Paul Millholen:Yeah if I had to pick one for everyone and if you did... Thing that you know probably 90% of martial art schools either don't talk about or if they do it the you're very kind of piece by piece and not really a big picture is like the law in fighting. And you know, probably the first seminar that I went to that wasn't someone else affiliated with was Rory miller he was doing a thing up in Boston about martial arts in the law. And just a few years before that I got in a little trouble, get into a little scuffle and it was something that you know, personally was a you know kind of resonated with me and I never heard of him before I just saw the title about you know the law and martial arts and I was like well, I got to check this out. And then when I met him you know I was just like wow, this is way better than I thought. I thought it was just gonna be, kind of you know, maybe like a two-hour seminar that I would take a couple notes and that was it. You know, he really introduced me to him and his philosophy and he had a couple books, I just picked up right on the spot the meditations on violence and the other one. Cause his first two are like probably like classic. I know, like since that you’ve gained a lot of popularity and it's come out with a book every year or so but yeah, those first two were just I think those are must reads. It really tells you how to you know, one spot violence so you don’t even get caught up in to it cause I think he mentioned that most of violence is the you know, social violence not predatory violence. So, you know, if someone pushing you, you don’t get in that, what he calls a monkey dance and you know, if it does happen again trouble how you can articulate it. So, you know if you don't have to spend the next year and a half in and out-of-court explaining yourself. So yeah Rory miller is probably one because it doesn’t matter what style you are in, whether it's kung Fu or karate, tae kwon do, whatever it's gonna help you. Mi Russo EllenJeremy Lesniak:For sure. And of course, Rory miller's been on the show, absolutely wonderful, wonderful episode one of my favorites to be honest because it just, I felt like we got so much more context for what he writes about. It gave me a much deeper understanding for his lessons.Paul Millholen:Yeah and the fact that he's very... There is no ego involved like that, he is not one I’m not trying to blow up any spots but we've seen people where you see him walk down the hall and they have the most elegant uniform on with 500 patches and they have 18 titles to their name in there, they're really built up and you know, the thing about him was when I met him, he was not what you think of a, probably like you know, he's not like a movie star in martial arts, he's no kinda van Damme or anything like that he's like low low [00:44:30.23] and I mean he just amazing but like there's no ego there and what I like about him was that you know he says that he's not trying to create a mini him, he wants you to do your own thing and I think you know, that's why I really enjoy you know, listen to him speaker or Mr. Wallace cause they didn't want to be your many them, they want you know take what they do and make it your own which you know, I think that's the correct way on or how I look at it.[00:45:02.25]Jeremy Lesniak:Let's keep you going. Goals. Is there stuff that you're looking out the future and saying you know this is important to me or not?Paul Millholen:For the year just to get my school grown cause unfortunately I didn’t know since the last I opened up, I thought I did my research I didn't do that well I guess but there's a lot of competition out there. So, you know it’s very hard for me like the first 3-4 years at the school I was just alright I’m doing strictly tkd. It’s very tough when you know, you got a white dude teaching the Korean martial art when you know, down the street there is a Korean teaching taekwondo so, it's you know 9/10 will probably say I go to the source. Now even though it' doesn’t depend on the skill or anything it just oh taekwondo is from Korea, there's a Korean guy down the street let go check out. So, you I’ve been kind of just kinda broadening out and you know, I’ve been doing a lot more to self-defense orientated drills that you know, I picked up from Robert McEwen who does the nga nihon goshin type style of aikido which is more I guess you would say you know, combative or realistic than maybe your traditional old sensei style. Cause I know it is actually not from that instructors it’s like an offshoot which is you know, like you said makes up 1% of the aikido community but you know it’s very kind of down to earth and just practical and you know, street ready kind of right off the bat without go to much flowery stuff. But you have been doing kind that just as a more you know adding self-defense you know I’ll always remember my roots and my number one reason for training was to to stay safe and years ago too I was happen to be a bouncer at this like really bad bar and you know, the owner said right and I want to do any punch or kicking to keep people out. So, you know, kind of off shoot that, I was studying in Boston with some [00:47:14.59] white crane stuff actually affiliates of that YMAA production which I know they're huge and that school out there I think the instructor's name was ben warner. Yeah it was a blast working out him, I don't do that now because I have the aikido. But you know I always wanted to pick something up because you know, I mentioned in our conversation that we take a couple weeks ago about your different ranges and yeah from outside range, I got all the tools I need but you enter the forehead to forehead range you know that's what I picked up the [00:47:47.55] then like I gave a shout out to your boy Richard hover last time, he does that like the elbow to elbow. So, I think what keeps me going is just trying to be you know more well-rounded and just get people you know more stuff the put in your toolbox. You know it's not because I’m one of those people that like play Pokémon about, you know, collect them all. I’m not a technique hoarder but you know I definitely want people to be prepared. So, you know, if all you do is you know stuff from one range and not others and I think you do a disservice. So that's why the kind of picking up your stuff from you here and there to kind of throw in. Because one thing I was surprised about was last year we went to mobile Alabama. I know I always pronounce it wrong.Jeremy Lesniak:Mobile.Paul Millholen:We did a lot of wrestling there and when I go to the karate colleges with Superfoot, I like to trade with the Mark Hatmaker who does a lot of western-style boxing and wrestling. That was something I never did in high school but I never realized like how much fun that is. I’ve been just doing more wrestling stuff in my class and you know I don't claim to be an expert or whatever but you know, I just like to throw kinda different stuff that people cause some people really gravitate to that, some people say wow never want to get that close and that's fine, but the least I kinda open their eyes to what's out there.Jeremy Lesniak:If people want to get a hold of you, where can they find you? How can they reach you? You know, feedback or maybe they’re near west Hartford and they want pop by or something.Paul Millholen:Oh yeah, my door is always open. We just moved to 121 [00:49:39.07] rd. W., Hartford. I do have a website and jitaetkd.com and my phone number 860-933-5232 and yeah, I mean if it is, even if you want to pop in and I just train for a night, life's all about experiences. So yeah so just come to a here [00:50:10.13] of training for longer time that that's fine too. That was probably the best ways to get in contact.Jeremy Lesniak:And of course, we'll link the website from the show notes. And some final words. Send us out.Paul Millholen:Final words, it's not about style it’s about your instructor cause you know people ask me all the time oh what do you think what's the best style or this or that. Or I heard you will bjjs better than this or I heard you know, Krav Maga is like this and I heard the you know kai ko shin karate is this blah blah. But I just tell people it’s about the instructor. And you know, find who you who your compatible with and you know, because I told you about my philosophy about how you know, I’m not really even though I come from a very old school, you know hit him over the head after doing stuff wrong, that not how I do it and I think that's another reason why I try spend much time with the Mr. Wallace as I can because when I went to college, I was a philosophy major and a philosopher that I’m really into the guy name Alan watts. And he always talks about don't think the work is work, think of it as play and you know, how many times have you heard Superfoot say you know, play with the techniques and you'll figure out. And I think that's why you know I really gravitate towards him is because you know his philosophy and how he interacts with students and you how we still training probably you know as hard as he did well maybe not hard but you know he still constantly try to improve and you know how many times have we seen instructors that are half his age and they got a belly out to their knees and you know, their training days are over they just point their fingers and say don’t do this do that. But yeah so you know that’s when if you're looking for school you know, go to more than one and see you know, who's instructor you're more compatible with or who's style you like the best and what don't go by oh I heard in the Facebook article that you know taekwondo the best I’m gonna do that because only that’s the way to go.Jeremy Lesniak:To be perfectly honest it wasn't for this show my friendship with Mr. Millholen never would’ve happened. It was because of my connection to bill Wallace and ultimately sensei Terry Dow that I met Mr. Millholen and we became training partners and we became friends and we spent some time together and he's a great guy and I appreciate our friendship, I appreciate the way that he pushes me in our training. And it's a pleasure for me to bring you an episode with someone that I get to interact with in that way because most of the people that we have on the show, I don't know well some of them I know personally but I really can't call them friends in the way that I can say Paul Millholen is my friend. So, thank you for being on the show, I appreciate your time and I look forward to next time we get to hang out whether it's training or taking a long car ride to somewhere fun. You can check out the show notes @whistlekickmartialartsradio.com we got some photos over there, we've got links, we’ve got 269 other episodes. There’s just a ton of great stuff there, sign up for the newsletter and that's it. It's all I’ve got for you today. Until next time, train hard. Smile and have a great day.